A nagging sensation at the pit of my stomach has been bothering me for some time now. It concerns topics like finding the right fit, belonging, and sentiments about jumping into uncharted waters with high risks and higher probability of failure and disappointment. Typical spirit-crushing consequences of the damned if you do, damned if you don’t-variety.
On one hand, the option is to sit it out and endure a bit more of the flogging until better odds show up just to make that jump a lot less risky. On the other hand, every nerve within you is screaming for release NOW. Like stubborn children who cannot be denied their candies and are now joined in a screeching chorus of tantrums that demand immediate gratification.
Hell of a thing not being able to move comfortably in a jungle/rainforest environment when you’re a camel. There’s just no reconciliation for that reality no matter how hard everybody tries to make it work. Momentary bursts of comfort may show up sporadically but there’s just no denying the fact that there are just some environments that support only specific types of inhabitants. Heaven for some, hell to others. There’s nothing personal or biased about it, it just is.
Ultimately, it’s the decision that counts, and I’m going the Invictus route on this one.